How to get rid of shyness and shyness

Each of us has ever felt a sense of constraint in an unfamiliar company or at a new job, but over time it passed, and we became what we are. But there are people who, even accustomed to the new atmosphere, do not cease to be shy about others, behave quietly so that they are not noticed and avoid communication.

If you are such a person, then you probably suffer from shyness. You have so many plans and ideas, but because of your cowardice, you cannot translate them into reality. To start a new life and stop being embarrassed by people, you need to go a long way and spend a lot of energy, but it's worth it. You will like your new me so much that you will not understand how you used to live in the shell of fear and inaction.

What is shyness

Shyness - a feeling of constraint and awkwardness in a society of people, a constant fear of causing someone's indignation and indignation. People worried about the opinions of others are closed and uncommunicative, they rarely have friends, they have no plans for the future. They do not like to act, being afraid not to live up to the expectations of others, and therefore prefer to sit out.

If you want to change your existence, stop living for nothing and reach heights in a career or other field, then it's time to start doing it right now. While you are thinking about how to avoid mistakes and blame, others are acting in your place.

Where does shyness come from

Why are some people relaxed and sociable, while others are withdrawn and insecure, because all of us are given equal chances at birth. How many examples we have of wonderful people who have achieved everything in life with their labor and perseverance. But many believe that they cannot do this, because they are not smart enough, beautiful, rich, and so on.

How we love to say that if we had a different appearance, a lot of money or communication, we would have achieved everything we wanted. But this does not save shyness. You will always find something that you will not be comfortable with in order to justify your inaction and cowardice. And this character trait will not allow you to move forward to the cherished goal.

The true cause of shyness is not in external circumstances, but in internal. Those that have traumatized your self-esteem as a child or older. Therefore, look for the answer in yourself. Remember how your parents treated you, praised or scolded, not allowing your creative abilities to reveal. Indeed, from an early age, shyness begins to develop.

At an older age, the cause may be a situation that made you feel awkward. People are often very cruel and insult others by stupidity and nearness. And, if you are an impressionable person, then this will certainly leave a mark on your self-esteem.

How to overcome shyness

When you understand the reason why you become shy, you can solve the problem. To do this, you need to let go of the situation, stop scrolling to yourself, think about it. Each of us is able to make mistakes, the main thing is to be able to draw the right conclusions from them.

Psychologists know how to deal with shyness. They advise for some time to adhere to new rules of behavior that help to change their inner world and destroy the wall between themselves and others.

Psychologists tips:

1. Accept yourself as you are. This commonplace phrase has a deep meaning.Until you stop condemning your shortcomings, you will not see the positive qualities that you possess. And each person has them, they just need to be found.
2. Do not think about the opinions of others. Never. You are your own example and you know what is best to do in a given situation. You have your principles and outlook on life. If someone does not agree with them, let him do as he sees fit. This rule will help not to bend under people and not to allow themselves to be manipulated.
3. Get rid of the habit of seeing only the bad in everything. Negative thoughts depress the psyche, enter into a stupor and do not give an adequate response to the situation. See how beautiful the world is and the people in it. Every day, begin to find positive qualities in acquaintances and colleagues, and soon you will cease to be afraid of them.
4. Do not worry about failures, especially since they happened not through your fault, but in connection with the circumstances. Feeling of guilt and responsibility for everything that happens around will lead to a nervous breakdown.
5. Think of a meaning for your existence. Set specific goals and achieve them. The mistake of many people, which leads to self-doubt, lies in the inability to adequately choose a dream. They want everything at once and, of course, do not achieve anything. If your goal is wealth (to have a house, a cottage, a car, an apartment), then divide it into several parts and gradually go in the given direction. First buy a car, then save up for an apartment. For these matters, you will not notice how you came to what you dreamed about.
6. Look presentable and always keep an eye on your appearance. So you rise in your own eyes. It is not necessary to be richly dressed; today, everyone can afford to choose stylish, but not very expensive things.
7. Use self-hypnosis techniques. These include auto-training and affirmations. Repeat yourself every day, as the heroine of Irina Muravyova: "I am the most charming and attractive!" Any words or wishes to oneself will be perceived by the subconscious for reality.
8. Get rid of the habit of imitating. Surely you have the ideal of the person you want to be like. This road leads nowhere. Understand that you cannot become a copy of your idol and only earn extra complexes for yourself. Instead, engage in self-development to expand your inner world and become better than you are now.
9. Sign up for a public speaking training. There you will meet the same shy people as you will find friends, as well as learn a lot of useful information and apply it in experience.
10. Think about the situations that bother you the most. Play them in front of the mirror, figure out how you will respond or act. This will help you not to be taken by surprise.
11. Some psychologists advise intentionally creating situations that make you shy. As the saying goes, the wedge is kicked out by wedge. But this method is suitable for those who do not suffer from mental disorders (obsessive state, depression), otherwise it will only aggravate the situation.

By ceasing to give free rein to your fears and emotions, you will not only get rid of shyness, but also understand how it prevented you from achieving your cherished goals. Living under the influence of opinions from the outside, we lose our self and cease to be ourselves. To avoid this, always follow the call of the heart, do not be afraid of mistakes and do not let yourself be humiliated. Then life will not seem as bad as you thought about it.

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