How to learn to communicate with people: 16 ways

The life of a modern person is closely connected with interpersonal communication. Men and women intersect daily at work, in a store, or in a sports club. But what to do when you are closed and do not know which side to approach, wishing to start a conversation? Only outcasts can live in an empty apartment without maintaining contact with anyone, so it is important to be able to find a common language with other people.

Ways to achieve effective communication

Eye contact
It is easy to gain the confidence of the person you are talking to if you are looking into his eyes during a conversation. Do not look away left and up, this sign indicates disinterest. If you lower your gaze down and look to the right, your friend may think about a likely catch.

Ideal - look at the interbrow area of ​​the one you are in contact with. This technique is used by sales managers, wanting to "get in" the goods. If at the same time the interlocutor looks at you, it will seem to him that you are looking into the eyes. It turns out a kind of optical illusion, take advantage of this.

Confidence is an undeniable trump card
Confident people can be seen from afar, they are characterized by a proud posture, a direct look and a high head. I want to communicate with such a person, he does not use a long prelude before starting a conversation, but immediately goes to the point. Be a confident conversationalist, so you will have an undeniable trump card in your sleeve!

Show your reliability and decisiveness, attract others with these qualities. Such personalities leave a lasting impression in the soul of newly made friends and do not suffer from a lack of attention.

"What's in a name…"
When you first meet a person, ask what his name is. It is important to remember that there is no sweeter song for the ears than the sound of a proper name. Address the listener only this way. If third parties join the conversation and you decide to tell a story that includes the name of a friend, do not use the pronoun “he” or “she”.

Try to associate your partner’s name with positive emotions. Share fun stories from life, smile sincerely, tell jokes. Solar personalities illuminate everyone who is in contact with them. Radiate positivity and energy!

Genuine interest
You must admit that it’s not interesting to spend hours listening to how a guy or girl talks about their life without showing interest in you. Such personalities are rightfully considered selfish; do not consider yourself among them. Show interest, take an interest in life, and do not burden others with your own turmoil. Conduct a dialogue, not a monologue.

Let the person join the conversation, after which the conversation will go on as usual. Eastern wisdom says: "Say once, the other two - listen!". Adhere to the great gurus of philosophy so as not to get stuck in a traffic jam of the prolonged silence that forms when two selfish persons meet.

Who does not risk, that ...
... loses positive emotions. Advice is inextricably linked to confidence. People are afraid, wanting to ask again or ask a question of interest. They mistakenly believe that they will be rejected or humiliated, but this is far from the case. A situation of this kind is due to the alleged insolvency of the listener, who considers himself unworthy of the interlocutor.

Do not be afraid of failure, analyze what has been said, ask relevant questions, express an opinion and give advice! Do not let emotions take precedence over self-esteem, maintain dignity in any circle of people, regardless of the situation.

Mirror effect
Gesture emphasizes the spoken words, facial expressions characterize them.Two points are inextricably linked. Do not try to remove your hands when talking, such a sign will look unnatural. Excessive waving is also undesirable, the interlocutor can take the action for nervousness.

Be calm, do not fold your arms over your chest, this technique means closure. Stand straight, bend your hands with boats and put your hands together. Also, you do not need to clench your fists, keep your palms open, only in such ways can you position others to your own person.

The greatest minds in the United States have proven the effectiveness of communication using the "mirror" method. The method consists in repeating the movements of the interlocutor and copying the intonation of his voice. However, do not do this like a parrot, the movements should be soft, invisible and as similar as possible. Psychologists claim that the “mirror” brings people together and helps them open up.

Knowledge is power
Read books, watch interesting programs and relevant films. Stay up to date, it is nice to communicate with a comprehensively developed person who knows how to maintain a conversation. Such personalities are gaining universal recognition and they are elevated to the podium.

Try to join the company in the first hour of communication, create topics for discussion, and draw others into the conversation. Do not hide your knowledge, but do not be too clever not to alienate others.

Relevance of the questions asked
Do not allow pauses in communication that will embarrass both sides of the conversation. When contact is just being established and people are not yet accustomed to each other's society, it is important to create the right atmosphere for further manipulations. The interlocutor said that at the weekend going to the country? Great, ask him how far she is and whether fishing is welcome there. Do not answer the memorized “I see”, this statement of anyone will lead into bewilderment.

Avoid questions that can only be answered in monosyllables. Ask so that the other side is forced to answer in full. There is no need to throw a person a number of questions, be interested in measured and "in the subject." If it was a question of construction, a car heading would be inappropriate.

The correct formulation of thoughts
Suddenly an idea came up? Do not rush to share it, think carefully about what you are going to say. Express yourself in clear phrases, do not jump from one place to another, adapt people to your thoughts. Surrounding non-psychics, they do not always understand what is at stake, although they nod in response. As mentioned above, "assent" comes from a fear of asking or from unwillingness to listen.

Keep the story interesting, not monotonous, so that you want to know the continuation. It is important to realize that everyone has their own idea of ​​what is told. You presented white sand and a blue ocean, and the interlocutor saw only shells and algae on the shore. Formulate your own thoughts, interest and fuel the interest of the public.

Openness is not a vice
Be honest and open, do not create misunderstandings due to inconsistencies. Share your personal life, but within reason. Choose “non-closed” information for the story. When a man or woman cheats, the truth soon comes out and spoils the friendship.

Now it’s important to create that inextricable link between the opponents, because of which you will meet again over a cup of coffee. Open people quickly find friends, but also often betray them. Look at the situation, if the interlocutor does not inspire confidence - do not share the innermost.

Openness is associated with decency and honesty - two qualities of a business person. As a rule, girls are more relaxed, and behind a bottle of good wine their tongue is completely untied. The guys are more difficult in this regard, they do not share their experiences with the first comer.

How to overcome the barrier in communication

The personality determines not only opinion, strength of character and desire for more, but also complexes, fear and shyness. What to do when the interruption in communication was so long that a barrier formed? Let's talk about everything in order.

Lack of common themes
Not sure what to talk about? There are a number of common topics that will set the stage for further conversation. Discuss film industry news, popular sports destinations, world news, and finally weather and nature. When communicating on the above topics, you do not need to have astronomical knowledge.

Intrigue and gossip
Relaxing in the company, and a girl comes to you with conversations, about which there are still rumors? Do not succumb to provocations, “hammer” on gossip and envious people. Cultivate a useful quality - to judge a person based on your own convictions, and not long languages, chatting behind your back.

Adrenaline rush
The interlocutor is utter nonsense? Start arguing and prove right? Stop. One must be able to cope with a storm that destroys further communication. Go out into the fresh air, catch your breath.

It doesn’t matter what the true motives for behavior are - disagreement with husband or care of girlfriend. Don't get angry at others by embarrassing yourself. You will tell the interlocutor of filth, for which you will subsequently suffer with remorse.

How to learn to communicate with people

It is difficult for closed individuals to step over themselves and say a few phrases to keep the conversation going. However, a communication skill is also necessary as the ability to write and read. Specialists have developed a number of recommendations with which you can move forward.

Imaginary conversation
No matter how ridiculous it may sound, but talk to the furniture. Tell the closet how you spent the day and what you ate for lunch. Sociologists insist on the effectiveness of the procedure, because it is much more difficult to communicate with inanimate objects than with people. Try to build sentences connected and interesting. If the idea seems absurd, get a pet and chat with him.

Sweet praise
Pay attention to the personal qualities of the interlocutors, praise their skills. Did you like your colleague's blouse? Feel free to tell. Did you make excellent coffee in the cafe? Do not skimp on a sincere compliment. Words must come from the heart so that people believe you.

Chat with random people
Set out to talk daily with strangers. Going to the store for bread? Chat with the saleswoman about the freshness of the product. Can't find the right street? Ask your grandmother at the bus stop for directions. Greet the concierge and smile. The method is effective, despite its simplicity. He eradicates the fear of having a conversation first.

Interaction with others is an integral part of everyday life. Real communication skills come with practice. Delve into the opponent’s stories, ask questions and be sincere. Use exercises to improve your communication skills, overcome all sorts of barriers and fight emotions. Contact your interlocutor by name, join the team and become the soul of the company!

Video: how to learn to communicate with people