How to teach a child to sleep separately from parents

Sharing a dream with a baby is practical and convenient for mothers who breastfeed. A woman does not need to go several times a night to the cradle and rock the baby, because he feels the warmth and familiar smell, so he calms down faster and is less capricious. With age, the baby becomes more adult and independent, and the mother decides that it is time for him to have his own bed. But how to safely separate the child from the parents and teach to sleep separately?

Optimal time

Mom independently chooses the most successful moment, because she knows her own baby better than psychologists and other specialists. Introverted children who are happy to be alone in the room and do not require increased attention to their own person begin to separate from their parents in 1.5–2 years. Sociable and active kids try to stay under their mother’s side for as long as possible. But the hardest part is with shy and shy little ones who sleep restlessly and wake up from every rustle.

The child should be accustomed to own bed from 6-8 months when the number of night feedings is reduced. Infants at this age know how to roll over and take a comfortable position on their own, they are less likely to have colic, so sleep becomes longer and calmer. If the experiment fails, you should wait until the child erupts teeth, and try again.

From 4–5 years old, the Oedipus complex manifests itself in children: they are jealous of mom and dad and vice versa, they do not allow parents to hug each other and try to draw all the attention to themselves. Until this age, the child must learn to sleep separately, preferably in another room, otherwise in the future he may develop psychological problems.

There are several signs indicating that the baby is ready to move to its own bed:

1. A childish instinct is formed in a child when he divides things into “his” and “alien”.
2. The kid knows how to entertain himself on his own and does not ask every 5 minutes to see his mother in his arms.
3. A night's sleep lasts at least 6 hours, and if the baby wakes up, it does not start to cry or scream.

It is also possible to teach a child to sleep separately if he prevents his parents from adult affairs, because mom and dad also have a right to privacy.

When to wait

It is recommended to postpone the relocation of the baby to another room if:

• teeth erupt;
• the child has a cold and fever;
• the baby has just started going to kindergarten;
• he learns to eat or go to the toilet on his own.

Children are not able to master several skills at the same time, and in stressful situations, like a disease, they need a mother, which they associate with security and tranquility. Do not simultaneously shift the baby into its cradle and wean from the chest, otherwise the baby and the woman herself will have to forget about night rest.

Right arguments

With two-year-old family members you can agree and explain the situation. Tell that every adult has his own bed, and mom and dad too. The son or daughter is already big and brave, so they should sleep separately. Usually children try to imitate their parents. They agree to sleep in the other room during the day, but on condition that the mother is nearby. Gradually, the child becomes accustomed to rest on his bed and does not mind if he is offered to lie here at night.

Children love holidays and fairy tales, so why not celebrate his little move? Go with your child and choose a crib that he will like.Let it not fit into the interior, it looks strange or funny, but most importantly, the baby is delighted.

It seems to the child that he is losing his mother and a particle of her love when he agrees to sleep separately. If you mark this event with balls, a delicious cake and a new toy, then the transition to your own room turns into a grandiose and joyful event. You can even invite relatives or friends to celebrate the symbolic maturation of the baby. Everyone should praise the hero of the occasion, and parents proudly tell how big he is.

At the first call

For the first time, the cot can be placed next to the parent's bed. The child will fall asleep and see his mother, who acts on him soothingly. If parents firmly decided to move the baby to another room, then they should react to every cry at night and immediately rush to help. It is important for children to know that even if mom is at a distance, she will quickly come to the rescue.

It is not recommended to wait until the baby falls asleep next to the parents, and then transfer it. This method may work several times, but then the child will become restless and moody. You will have to spend more time on his motion sickness, because the baby will be afraid that he will wake up again in frightening loneliness.

Children from 3 years and more are smart enough to figure out: just cry and mother comes. Some begin to cunning, forcing parents to jump out of bed several times a night. If a child regularly complains about monsters, there are two reasons: he is trying to attract attention or is really afraid.

In the first case, mother or father is advised to be strict and not to deviate from the decision. You need to come into the room to the baby, look under the bed and in the closet to convince him that there is nothing wrong with it. A psychologist should work with the second situation. Perhaps the child was someone or something very scared, so now he is afraid of the dark or loneliness.

Dream room

It is good if a young family member makes his own bedroom. He chooses a place for the bed, arranges toys and paints the walls. When a child independently decorates his own territory, he fills it with comfort and safety. He is pleased to be in his room: playing, having fun, falling asleep.

Mom can put a cute little animal on the shelf, saying that the toy will protect the daughter of her son from monsters. The children's room must have a nightlight, it is better to leave the door ajar so as not to shield the child from the outside world.

If your baby is scared by rustles or other sounds, you can turn on quiet quiet music. Classics, some children's songs or lullabies are ideal. Singing mothers can record their own voice so that they soothe the baby.

Special rituals

To make the baby fall asleep faster, they recommend repeating the same actions every evening. For example, swimming, reading, watching cartoons or talking with mom. Thanks to a peculiar ritual, the child will develop the habit that if he put on pajamas with bears, then it is time to close his eyes and go to the Land of Dreams.

It is recommended to refrain from too active games or emotional conversations, after which it will be difficult for the baby to calm down and relax. Mom can ask the child about his dreams, tell her how her day went, read fairy tales, or simply lie nearby. Children fall asleep faster when they wait for something. For example, dad said that the next day they will go to the zoo or cafe, but for now you need to close your eyes and dream.

If a child asks his mother every night to stay with him, then you can cheat. Put his favorite toy next to the baby and say that the hare (bear, giraffe, cat) will stay in bed while the parent goes to brush her teeth, wash the dishes or help dad. But mom will definitely come back after 10-40 minutes.

In the morning, when the child wakes up, you should thank the toy that guarded the baby's sleep. The child will consider a teddy bear or a hare to be his mother’s assistant, who is not afraid to stay in the room with.

Secret: Some children sleep better if they smell their mother. Women carry the toy with them, clinging to a sweater or T-shirt so that it is “saturated” with the aroma of their body and perfume. In the evening, they give the toy to the baby, leaving with them a piece of themselves.

If the baby comes to the bedroom

Do children who have just moved into their own room wake up in the middle of the night and ask their mother for bed? You can not let the child under his blanket. If he is cold, you should wear warm pajamas or get a blanket. Drain, bring water, and then calm and take back to the nursery. The second time, the whole procedure should be repeated, and the third time silently put back into the crib and go to your room.

It is difficult for children to part with their beloved mother, but the sooner this happens, the more independent the child will be in later life. At first this task seems difficult and overwhelming, but thanks to patience and determination, parents manage to achieve what they want and to teach the baby to sleep separately.

Video: how to teach a child to sleep separately