How to become an outgoing and interesting person

Often in the company you can meet a pretty girl who sits aside and is silent. At first glance, such persons seem arrogant, but in reality the situation is different. Beautiful ladies endowed with natural charm, can not support the conversation. This situation arises for many reasons: some are afraid of communication, others do not know where to start a conversation. To become the soul of a company, you need to work on your own communication skills, improving them daily.

Step number 1. Do not analyze your own words

When a person feels awkward while communicating with other people, he tries to analyze his own communication at a subconscious level. From here begins the full-scale selection of the "right" words, develops isolation and awkwardness.

No need to think ahead of dialogues that have not yet taken place, act on the situation and at the same time follow the language. If you neglect this advice, you will not be able to experience true pleasure from communication in the company.

In cases when you are in an unfamiliar company, do not swear, do not let go of sharp remarks and jokes. In the rest of the plan there are no restrictions, it is not necessary to make sentences in the head according to the rules of the Russian language.

If you are suddenly disgraced, learn to laugh at yourself. Try to find a way out of the situation, while remaining positive, do not close. Learn to joke, thereby making people smile. Later you will notice that opponents experience the joy of communicating with you, this will contribute to emancipation.

Step number 2. Realistically Appreciate Criticism

To criticize your own “I” is a necessary thing, but the procedure must be carried out with cold mind. If you blame yourself for any reason, stop it.

There are frequent cases when a person, being alone with his thoughts, begins to engage in self-flagellation. Again and again, he scrolls through the awkward moments associated with interpersonal communication in his head. Such a move only exacerbates the situation, forcing to become closed and sullen.

Another category of persons, on the contrary, criticizes themselves, but does not perceive the instructions of others around them. This raises anger and aggression, although, in fact, the interlocutor may be right.

To become a cheerful and sociable person, you need to treat everything with humor. Know how to listen and hear what they say to you. It is not necessary to follow the direction, it is enough to give the impression that the opponent was understood.

Step number 3. Highlight Positive Features

When a person is closed, he does not notice his own advantages, seeing in all the minuses. If you relate to such characters, it's time to rectify the situation.

Take a notebook or album sheet, write down your positive qualities, achievements, victories. In this case, important attention must be paid to material well-being, intellectual and physical abilities, emotional component (personal character traits). When once again you decide to think negatively, read the foregoing and smile. You are a person with your pluses and minuses.

Get started with the mind. Drive the idea that you are a cheerful and sociable person. Do not use such words as “bore”, “spleen”, “antisocial”, “boring”, “non-communicative”, etc. in relation to yourself. As soon as you believe that you are able to maintain a conversation and be the soul of the company, this will certainly happen. Everything that happens is in the head.

It is also important on a subconscious level to agree with yourself that you love people. Such a move will help to reveal you as a person, pushing you to interesting acquaintances. Of course, there are many hypocritical, evil and greedy people, but you should not send everyone under one comb. Learn to distinguish between these characters from really worthy of your interlocutors.

Step number 4. Do not overestimate your importance

A very interesting discovery was made by psychologists. They proved that modest personalities, which the company usually does not notice, tend to think that they are significant. Such people sincerely believe that other participants in the conversation are following them and secretly criticizing them. However, such misconceptions are extremely erroneous.

This paradox makes a person feel uncomfortable while in a large company. Hence the reluctance to communicate and the fear of contact in general.

Such an outcome of events does not mean at all that your interlocutors are indifferent to your presence, no. They are too busy to constantly pay attention or engage in unnecessary criticism in their heads.

People are so passionate about their own "I" that they simply will not notice the likely disgrace or incorrect statement of words. For this reason, you do not need to lock yourself in, stop paying attention to others. Even if your oversight (which has not yet occurred) is noticed, it will be forgotten after 5-10 minutes.

Step number 5. Become an active conversationalist

To become a sociable person, you need to learn to listen to the interlocutor and actively maintain dialogue. In the process of communication, pay attention to the behavior of the opponent, remember what he says. Ask relevant questions, do not look away, look in the eye. Nod in every possible way, make it clear that you are not indifferent to his story.

Learn to respect the person standing opposite you and telling something, in his opinion, interesting. Do not check the phone every 5 minutes, do not sit on VKontakte, do not look around. Such behavior is considered rude, it will show the opponent that you are not interested in his company.

Maintain a positive wave, do not complain about life, do not talk about poor financial well-being. On the contrary, make it clear that not a single difficulty will lead you astray. When an opponent asks you to say “something about yourself”, focus on the fun moments. If the person you want to get advice, try to sincerely select the words and solve the problem.

Step number 6. Practice communication

Like any other business, the ability to be a fun and sociable person appears with experience. You can’t immediately be born the soul of the company, people come to this with age, the basics are laid in childhood. Get ready for the fact that from now on you will have to leave the comfort zone and train hard.

At every opportunity, do not miss the opportunity to spread a couple of phrases with colleagues, household, friends. Do not divide life into "training" and "everyday life", combine one with the other.

Do not be afraid to talk with the seller about the weather or with the bus driver about the traffic situation. Ask the neighboring grandmothers about their health or discuss a yard cat. You must be involved in all areas of life, behave at ease.

Do not refuse the invitation of friends to attend a large weekend party, go bowling with the company or chat in the park. Become the initiator of parties, get everyone together, go have fun and chat. Interesting events that have occurred with the company will create the basis for discussion of a new topic.

Step number 7. Pay attention to gestures.

If you want to get involved in the dialogue, you do not need to stand in the corner of the room or modestly sit on the sofa, arms crossed over his chest. This sign symbolizes closeness, inability to communicate. Also, do not constantly nod at the phone, showing disinterest. Live in a real, not virtual world.

Smile more often, look in the eyes, do not tug on clothes. Show yourself open and ready for interesting conversations. Do not wait when you are called to the company, come yourself. Show people that you have an interest in communicating with them, become an initiator.

Step number 8. Make new friends

Many people for certain reasons are afraid of new acquaintances, and this is not surprising. For a person who is not used to constant communication, this state of affairs is a real stress. Nevertheless, in order to become cheerful and sociable, you need to work on yourself constantly.

When you keep in touch only with good friends, you automatically fall into the comfort zone. There is no need to talk about common topics, dialogues become more personal open. In the case of unfamiliar people, there is a need for constant adaptation, which is considered an undeniable plus.

Look for any ways to make new friends. Travel, communicate on social networks, attend large parties. Do not refuse friends when they once again invite you to meet interesting people. The main thing is to remain yourself in any situation, do not try to please everyone. Defend opinion, but do not argue too violently. Learn to say “No!” If the situation requires it.

It is easy to become a sociable and cheerful person, if you follow certain psychological aspects. Do not try to analyze your own words and actions, learn to perceive objective criticism, do not follow the path of emotions. Pay attention to positive features, regularly improve in conversations with opponents. Look for ways to make new friends, become an active conversationalist.

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