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A woman’s terrible nightmare looks something like this: the husband once again returns home and goes straight to the closet to collect things, arguing the actions of going to another lady. How to return a spouse who has crossed over to the side of her lover? Go to a fortuneteller so that she whispers a love spell or solve family affairs on her own? Let's try to figure it out together.
Step back and release the pain
Based on practice, faithful wives become isolated after the departure of the spouse. The behavior is quite understandable and explainable, the meaning of life is lost, pain absorbs the mind. At this stage, you need to cope with yourself in order to come up with a plan for the husband to return to the family.
Often you can hear from women the phrase "The husband went to the love woman, I am dying." Come on, you are not dying! Many ladies find the strength to live with such a thought and successfully do business. Try to focus on other things until the storm of emotions subsides.
If now you are unable to fight for marriage, win your own life and put it in order. Sign up for dancing or in the gym, the sport raises strength of mind. Increase physical activity, it will remove all the adrenaline and negative thoughts. You can do repairs in the apartment, re-wallpaper, make a rearrangement. Create a cozy nest to spend time with pleasure.
Learn to forgive
This stage involves the forgiveness of the husband and the enemy girl. It’s difficult, but only extremely strong people do this, follow them. Forgive my mistress for her mediocrity, she was not able to start her own family, she had enough brains exclusively for the theft of someone else's husband. Sorry for the inability to save the marriage. Both are a miserable couple, they ruin other people's lives because of their own selfishness. As they say in the psychiatric dispensary "They don’t take offense at the sick," release the insult, otherwise it will swallow you whole.
Focus on the idea that things are happening for good reason. The situation shows that you can easily cope without a man, being strong and self-sufficient. Perhaps the husband will understand that he did not value his wife enough and will begin to regret the misconduct. Look at what is happening from the point of view of logic, look for a pattern in difficult life circumstances.
Take a sober look at things
Look at the situation soundly and evaluate it realistically. If you know for sure that your husband left due to constant humiliation and a “sawmill” on your part, there is no chance, you just have to let him go. Another option: you were in a happy marriage, then a high-heeled piglet appeared and became his obsession, in this situation you can return your spouse. Men love comfort and stability, you rarely see a representative of the strong half of humanity who claim the opposite.
If the husband has known the girl recently, but she so quickly overshadowed his mind, he will come to his senses. In the meantime, you sit and think what you did wrong. Maybe they often scolded the partner for ridiculous misconduct or insulted the mother-in-law? For a long time they did not cook normal food, did not listen to the words? Analyze quarrels and comments to find out the true motives of her husband's behavior.
Self improvement
Stop feeling sorry for yourself and stop repeating how many years you spent in vain. Do not lament, the time of self-flagellation has passed. No man will enjoy watching a pitiful wife. On the contrary, your husband will prefer to stay with his mistress, who is not lazy to look after her appearance, regularly apply makeup and visit a hairdresser.
Take an example from the enemy! Change your haircut and dye your hair, go shopping and get sexy lingerie, you will feel more confident in it. Change the trousers for a beautiful tight-fitting dress, and replace the jeans with a pencil skirt.
Attend a trial lesson in Pole-dance (dance on a pylon), do stretching (stretching), get your body in shape. Men return to beautiful women, regardless of whether her inner world is rich or not. Choose a hobby that takes away all your personal time, happiness in the details. Now we need to focus on our own well-being.
Avoid the enemy
Do not look for reasons to meet, do not look out and do not analyze the husband's mistress. If the situation is more complicated, and you work in the same company or intersect in a common company, avoid such meetings, become smarter. You may have to change jobs, but this is better than constantly tormented by thoughts of “What did he find in it?”. Do not force yourself, try not to meet your spouse’s mistress even occasionally.
Load of responsibility
The time of self-flagellation has passed, you have sorted out the mistakes and wept a lot, now you need to act. Do not scream or beg your husband to return, let go. Just felt freedom, a man wants to go back to a cozy house. Forbid yourself to show disrespect, watch the speech when communicating with the traitor. Do not blackmail children, do not cry, and do not blame yourself for all mortal sins.
Develop a strategy that will allow a man to see the seriousness of his actions. He must understand that he is not just changing the house, but betraying a woman who has been around for many years. Make it clear that you are better than a new candy in a beautiful wrapper, focus on the moments experienced together. Do not humble yourself, do not cry, do not reproach the spouse for the deed, the choice is the choice, you have to pay for everything, its time will come.
Gone, but not quite
Husband continues to live with you, but runs at night to his mistress? No, fire! Say that this state of affairs does not suit you, put your partner in front of a choice if you do not want to drive him out altogether. Show that you will not put up with the presence of a third superfluous, do not be afraid to speak out, he is the culprit, not you.
It is important to choose the right words, screaming and broken dishes will not help here. Be open to dialogue, tell us about the pain that eats you from the inside. Try to express yourself without self-pity, state the facts. If this does not help, make it clear that you still cherish it, despite the betrayal.
Express yourself very frankly, explain that if you continue meeting with your mistress, you will say goodbye to him forever and ever. You will see each other only in emergency cases, such as the division of property, the registry office (upon divorce) and gatherings with children, that's all.
There are times when a man stays with her lover for days on end, periodically returning home to eat borsch. Properly offer him to leave a second life, warn that there will be no other chance. Do not let the situation drift, otherwise the partner will think that he is secretly allowed to rest and sleep with others, and later return to his wife in bed. Have respect for yourself and your body.
Negotiation table
Time passed, everyone calmed down? Sit down at the negotiating table. Try to bring your husband into a constructive dialogue, prepare dinner and calmly talk. Do not push, communicate politely and easily, approach the situation with a certain sly one. Come from far away, buy a bottle of good wine and listen to his position. Perhaps you made a mistake in certain situations, and this conversation will provide an opportunity to fix everything. The following scenario will serve as an ideal option: you discuss problems, try to solve them, then agree to build relations anew. The spouse must forever say goodbye to her mistress, and you - promise him the maximum return.Emphasize that all errors are clear and will not be repeated.
New life
Not always a man returns to the family after a short period. It happens that a woman has established life, crawled out of a self-flagellation pit, after which the hubby returns to the threshold like a beaten dog. Maybe you should start with a clean slate?
Men are owners and selfish by nature, not everyone will like that the former passion calmly exists without tears and pain. For these reasons, husbands, as a rule, return to a warmed place. Time will pass, you will be able to decide whether to take it back or send it home.
Can't get my husband back from his mistress? Tidy up your own thoughts, speak out to your girlfriend or cry in the pillow. Engage in self-development, enroll in a gym, and then proceed to a full-scale operation. Avoid meeting with your mistress, bring your spouse to a constructive dialogue and sit down at the negotiating table.
Video: how to return a husband to the family
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